Tuesday, March 30, 2010
7. Foul Ball - This is a term so dirty and filthy we've used it for the name of our softball team for the past 3 years. In baseball terms it means a ball that is hit outside of the fair lines. In dirty terminology it refers to a malodorous scent proceeding from the scrotilia. A corollary to this term would be "foul pole".
6. Hidden Ball Trick - With a runner on first, the first baseman will call time out and have a conference with the pitcher at which point the pitcher secretly hands him the ball. After returning to his position, the first baseman proceeds to tag out the clueless runner as he leads off first base. I'll leave it to your imagination to figure out the dirty version because I haven't quite worked the details out myself.
5. Get Good Wood - In baseball this means to make good, solid contact with the ball when hitting. The dirty use of the word is pretty self explanatory. If you can't figure it out for yourself, the good folks at Pfizer can help you out: http://www.viagra.com
4. Bush League - The "bush leagues" are any of the small, independent leagues that used to be popular throughout the country where has-been and never-will-be players would find themselves stuck. The term could also refer to a competition in which the goal is a certain part of the female anatomy.
3. Find A Hole - Hitting it "where they ain't", or finding a spot in field where the defense can't get the ball. In baseball, there are a vast number of holes you can find. In the business of love there are only 3 or 4 possibilities.
2. Chin Music - Throwing a high, hard fastball at the hitter's head in order to "send a message". Without getting into all the sordid details, the filthy use of the term is synonymous with the phrase "take one off the chin".
And finally . . .
1. Double Header - In baseball, two back-to-back games in one day. In adult talk, it means . . . oh come one! You can figure this one out for yourself.
There you have it! The Top 7 Filthy Baseball Terms. If you feel I've missed something, feel free to post it in the comments below. Keep your eyes open in the future for other Filthy Sports Lists and anything else I fee like commenting on.
Sunday, March 21, 2010
Pretty much anyone who knows me knows where I line up politically. I'm very conservative; and when I say "very conservative" I mean Reagan is Lenin and W is . . . I don't know . . . some sort of semi-retarded communist dictator. I think the Federal Government's job is to protect us if we get attacked and ensure my rights aren't violated. That's it. It's not the government's job to make sure I can get my lung cancer operated on after I've smoked for 30 years. If I slip down a cliff and break my neck while trying to get to a waterfall, that's not your responsibility and you shouldn't have to pay for it. I'm tired of people thinking the Federal Government is a momma cow and we're the calves in there trying to find a teet. Where do you think that milk comes from in the first place? The "30 million Americans without health insurance that are now covered" is a huge steaming pile. A third of that group are illegal immigrants who shouldn't be covered to begin with. Another huge chunk are people in their 20s and 30s who could afford insurance but have decided they don't want to buy it because they don't think they'll need it. Three quarters of the citizens in the country were against this particular version of health care reform. How in the world did this get passed? It's just like how the "pretty, popular girl" wins the Prom Queen every year even though most of the kids in the school secretly hate her. The Congressmen are voting yes because they'd rather impress the Prom Queen than vote for the girl who deserves to win.
So now what happens? The state of Idaho has already passed a bill/statement/resolution/whatever saying they will sue the Federal Government if they pass the bill. Something like 37 other states are working on similar bills. The tenth amendment to the constitution (remember that thing Congressmen, Senators, and President?) basically states that any task that isn't specifically given to the Feds in the Constitution is off limits. The Feds have no right in schools, the arts, and certainly not in health care. With the passage of this bill, the Federal Government is requiring citizens to spend their money on something they may or may not want. This is unconstitutional no matter how badly you want health care for all. Idaho and other states are perfectly within their legal rights to sue on the matter and they will. Ultimately this whole thing is going to end up in the hands of the Supreme Court where we will have another States' Rights Issue to resolve. The Supreme Court has generally sided with the states in these issues but I'm having my doubts. In the words of the ancient philosopher Obi Wan Kenobi, "I've got a bad feeling about this." This decision will be about more than just health care. It will be about how far the Feds are willing to go to push their agenda on the states and how far the Court is going to allow them to go. No matter which way they decide, this is an important moment in America's history. We will either confirm that we are indeed a Republic of individual states and the most free country in history, or we will confirm that the original ideas of our founding fathers are no longer important. Let's hope for the first one.
Tuesday, March 16, 2010
7. Best SNL Bits of All Time - This episode ended up being me talking to my cousins Bryce and Connor about SNL bits and other tom foolery.
6. Underrated Movies - I talked about some of the best movies that no one talks about. If you're a movie lover, check out this episode.
5. Clay's Boston Marathon - I interviewed an actual person for this show: my buddy Clay. We talked about him running his first Boston Marathon (extremely successfully by the way).
4. No Name Show Premier - Oh what could've been. The show was originally supposed to be myself and two buddies from work talking about whatever we felt like. That format lasted one whole week. Listen to this show always makes me realize how entertaining this show could have been had they stuck it out.
3. America Rocks - We didn't end up talking about how great America was that much but this was the first time The Ed called into the show. It was great to finally meet the man.
2. Peter Long from Elmo's Place - The most controversial episode of the No Name Show featured a guy named Peter Long from Elmo's Place, a halfway house for recently released sex offenders. This one actually got me in trouble with the in laws for a little bit.
1. Should Skyscrapers Be Banned - My favorite episode featured Dr. Johathan Ceran from SOAR who discussed the evils of skyscrapers. If you only listen to one episode of the show, listen to this one.
There ya have it. My list of my 7 favorite episodes of the No Name Show. Give them a listen and feel free to let me know what you think.
Wednesday, March 10, 2010
A friend of mine passed away yesterday. He wasn't a real close friend, but he was a guy I've known for about 10 years and played volleyball with more times than I can count. To be honest I was always a little jealous of him. You'd watch him in the sand and it looked like he never tried. He wasn't that much taller than me, he couldn't jump higher than me (in fact the last few times I saw him play he couldn't jump at all), but he dominated in a way I could only dream of. On top of that, he was one of the nicest, friendliest guys I've ever known. Literally, everyone loved him. He was 37 years old, had a wife and kids; way too young to be gone.
I spent the last couple hours going through pictures on my computer for a picture of him to stick up here. Sadly, I couldn't find one. I did find one which is sort of fitting. For my friend, this game is over. I imagine he's at a place now where the weather is always perfect, the sand is soft, and his aching knees no longer hold him down. Somewhere in heaven is a beach with perfect sand, and it's being put to good use today. See you when I get there Aaron.
Sunday, March 7, 2010
We climbed out of the canyon on the opposite side and eventually ran into an old logging road that ran parallel to the creek. I followed the road downstream for a little ways. I thought I heard one more waterfall but at this point I was high above the creek and not in the mood for another long, steep climb down into the canyon (perhaps at a future date). After getting back to the car, I checked out the creek a little further upstream and ran into a really cool old dam. The drop off the dam is about 50' tall and 80' wide. It was really neat. Next on the agenda will probably be Bald Mountain Falls next Saturday. I'll probably throw some other waterfall into the mix to make it a full day. Should be fun.
Saturday, March 6, 2010
Wednesday, February 17, 2010
Friday, February 12, 2010
Monday, February 8, 2010
Thursday, February 4, 2010
Tuesday, February 2, 2010
Honorable Mentions - Backend, Balance Hole, Blow, Box, Cherry, Choke, Cranker, Squirt, Ovaled Hole, Release Point
7. Angle of Entry - The angle at which the ball hits the pocket. (Or the angle something else hits something else.)
6. Ball Reaction - The change in a ball's direction as it travels down the lane.
5. Stroker - A bowler with a smooth swing and no sudden acceleration in his/her swing. (Yeah right)
4. Four Bagger - Four strikes in a row, also referred to as a Hambone. This term could have two dirty definitions: a. "Bagging" four women in one night. b. A woman with a great body but a face so ugly you have to put four bags over it.
3. Mule Ears - A term for the 7-10 split. I'm not even sure why this sounds dirty but it just seems like it should have some filthy alternate definition.
2. Squeezer - Someone who holds the ball with excessive force. The dirty definition would be "someone who holds the ball with excessive force".
And the #1 filthy bowling term is . . .
1. Double Wood - Also known as a "sleeper". This is when you leave two pins standing after your first ball, one directly behind the other (i.e. 2-8, 3-9). I don't think I need to describe the dirty definition of this one.
So there you have it. Proof positive that bowlers are not only have dirty bodies, but also dirty minds.
Monday, February 1, 2010
Sunday, January 31, 2010
I first became aware of a waterfall on Sandy Creek from the work of Pat Buller (http://www.pdbphotos.net/). Today after church, I set out with Mongo the dog in search of this waterfall. Pat had informed me that the falls were about 1/2 a mile upstream from the Koma Kulshan Powerhouse on Sandy Creek. The trek began with an easy 3/4 of a mile walk up a gravel road to the powerhouse. From there, it was hardcore, northwest bushwhacking. It took me over an hour to travel the 1/2 mile from the powerhouse to the falls. I forded the creek twice on the way in.
When I finally got a look at the falls, I was about 100' above the creek with a near vertical cliff wall below me. I backtracked a short distance until I found a spot where I carefully climbed down to the creek. From there it was a simple matter of wading nearly waist deep in the near freezing water of Sandy Creek to a clear view. The falls were worth the trouble however. Sandy Creek Falls is only about 25' tall but one of the more beautiful waterfalls you'll find anywhere. There was actually a small, 10' upper tier about 100' upstream that could be added to the height but it's not really necessary. Mongo and I sat on a mossy rock watching the falls and eating our lunch for nearly an hour before time forced us to make our way back to the car. This isn't a waterfall everyone can visit but for those with the ability, it is a great spot. I imagine in the summer it would be fairly easy to just wade right up the creek to the falls. It would be a wet experience but substantially easier than trying to smash through the stickers covering the banks of the creek.